Hello! Today I'm here to complain about my life has a percussionist (this is definitely a first world problem). For those of you who don't know, I am a percussionist (the people that stand in the back of the band during a concert and hit drums and xylophones and have classy triangle solos, yeah I'm one of them) in band class at school. Our band program requires everyone involved in band to be in marching band, so I'm also on the school drumline. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love music and love playing it, but sometimes things and people get on my nerves.
*If you are a percussionist from my school, don't read on. Please.*
Here come my grievances in no particular order:
1) Wearing a harness under my marching band uniform! When I have a harness on inside my uniform, I can hardly pick anything up off the floor because it doesn't allow me to bend over. I'm also one of the shorter, smaller people on the drumline, so I look like some kind of mutated gorilla.
2) When my mallets click while I'm playing. I play four mallet solos on the marimba (a larger, prettier xylophone), which is one of my favorite parts of being a percussionist. However, I absolutely hate it when my mallets start sliding cause my hands are sweaty and the two mallets in each of my hands start to click. My instructor yelled at me the other day about it too. >.<
3) The percussion section is SUPER competitive. This is only my opinion, but I feel like every time auditions for chair placements or drumline roll around, everyone is practicing like mad. All the other instrument sections are so chill, but percussion auditions fry my brain and music ability every time. By the time auditions are over, I'm a total wreck.
4) Parades! Being on the drumline means that we have to play the ENTIRE time during a parade to keep the rest of the band marching in time. I feel really bad for complaining cause the tenor people have way heavier drums, but by the end of our annual Septemberfest parade, I'm always about to collapse when I take off my snare.
5) Buying all sorts of mallets/sticks/beaters/brushes/any other watchmacallits. I don't do this personally because most of the above are provided by my school. But I have seen some people with HUGE stickbags (what do you have in there, a child?) with all sorts of mallets and stuff that must have cost a fortune.
6) Waiting for a very long time during tacet movements. Some people may think that we're lucky to not play for a particular movement, but I always am bored to the point of tears. Well, maybe not tears, but you get the point. It's a good opportunity to do homework, but really, who wants to do homework?
7) We need to stand. The whole time. Enough Said.
8) My left ear is going deaf soon. Sometimes I forget my earplugs when we rehearse for marching band. I stand on the right most side of the drumline, so I always get an earful of whatever it is we're playing. And I always get it loudly.
9) I'm short! I don't know if it's like this for every other drumline/percussion section out there, but everyone is about a foot taller than me. Really.
10) Percussion is a male-dominated instrumental section. I'm not very good with dealing with a lot of testosterone for a very long time cause I only have sisters. Here is a little of what's going on in my mind: Oh my... Did he really just do that? Did he really just say that?? Can they go somewhere else to do that? Why did he just fart and laugh about it??? Why is he not shutting up? Can someone just give me a hammer?! I need to knock someone out before I go crazy. You know what? I'm just gonna leave.
11) When I can't find the right triangle beater. When I can't find the right auxiliary instrument. When I can't find the right ANYTHING.
12) When people don't clean up after themselves. I'm definitely guilty of this self-convicted crime, but I try to remember... I really do try...
13) I have the same marimba solo piece as someone else. For this one, I'm just going to blame my percussion instructor who teaches the other percussionists at school too. I really hate it when I'm given the same piece as someone else. I feel like there's no originality in anything I play because someone else already played it! Someone brought up a question the other day: "Are there only 5 solo pieces around here? Cuz that's all I hear you guys play." Good question, my friend, good question.
Well, this concludes my rant about being a percussionist. I'd like to stress that even though I'm complaining massively (Mom says I've always been really good at complaining), I still love being in percussion. Annndd... if you're a percussionist from school who read this anyway, don't take this too seriously. This is solely for my entertainment. I think.
Thanks for reading!
*If you are a percussionist from my school, don't read on. Please.*
Here come my grievances in no particular order:
1) Wearing a harness under my marching band uniform! When I have a harness on inside my uniform, I can hardly pick anything up off the floor because it doesn't allow me to bend over. I'm also one of the shorter, smaller people on the drumline, so I look like some kind of mutated gorilla.
2) When my mallets click while I'm playing. I play four mallet solos on the marimba (a larger, prettier xylophone), which is one of my favorite parts of being a percussionist. However, I absolutely hate it when my mallets start sliding cause my hands are sweaty and the two mallets in each of my hands start to click. My instructor yelled at me the other day about it too. >.<
3) The percussion section is SUPER competitive. This is only my opinion, but I feel like every time auditions for chair placements or drumline roll around, everyone is practicing like mad. All the other instrument sections are so chill, but percussion auditions fry my brain and music ability every time. By the time auditions are over, I'm a total wreck.
4) Parades! Being on the drumline means that we have to play the ENTIRE time during a parade to keep the rest of the band marching in time. I feel really bad for complaining cause the tenor people have way heavier drums, but by the end of our annual Septemberfest parade, I'm always about to collapse when I take off my snare.
5) Buying all sorts of mallets/sticks/beaters/brushes/any other watchmacallits. I don't do this personally because most of the above are provided by my school. But I have seen some people with HUGE stickbags (what do you have in there, a child?) with all sorts of mallets and stuff that must have cost a fortune.
6) Waiting for a very long time during tacet movements. Some people may think that we're lucky to not play for a particular movement, but I always am bored to the point of tears. Well, maybe not tears, but you get the point. It's a good opportunity to do homework, but really, who wants to do homework?
7) We need to stand. The whole time. Enough Said.
8) My left ear is going deaf soon. Sometimes I forget my earplugs when we rehearse for marching band. I stand on the right most side of the drumline, so I always get an earful of whatever it is we're playing. And I always get it loudly.
9) I'm short! I don't know if it's like this for every other drumline/percussion section out there, but everyone is about a foot taller than me. Really.
10) Percussion is a male-dominated instrumental section. I'm not very good with dealing with a lot of testosterone for a very long time cause I only have sisters. Here is a little of what's going on in my mind: Oh my... Did he really just do that? Did he really just say that?? Can they go somewhere else to do that? Why did he just fart and laugh about it??? Why is he not shutting up? Can someone just give me a hammer?! I need to knock someone out before I go crazy. You know what? I'm just gonna leave.
11) When I can't find the right triangle beater. When I can't find the right auxiliary instrument. When I can't find the right ANYTHING.
12) When people don't clean up after themselves. I'm definitely guilty of this self-convicted crime, but I try to remember... I really do try...
13) I have the same marimba solo piece as someone else. For this one, I'm just going to blame my percussion instructor who teaches the other percussionists at school too. I really hate it when I'm given the same piece as someone else. I feel like there's no originality in anything I play because someone else already played it! Someone brought up a question the other day: "Are there only 5 solo pieces around here? Cuz that's all I hear you guys play." Good question, my friend, good question.
Well, this concludes my rant about being a percussionist. I'd like to stress that even though I'm complaining massively (Mom says I've always been really good at complaining), I still love being in percussion. Annndd... if you're a percussionist from school who read this anyway, don't take this too seriously. This is solely for my entertainment. I think.
Thanks for reading!
